My life, my way? No way, Jose.

Your twenties are your years to learn. To figure your sh*t out. To have your ‘AH-HA!’ moment/s. Or so they say. But why is a number, your age, so definitive to your life and its outcome? Why can’t you realise one day that your life is or is not what you want. Irrespective of your DOB, age or this ‘number’. To me, I thought I always knew what I wanted. I fell into a career straight out of high school which saw me pull out of my university degree and just do the 9-5 and thought that this was it. How life was ‘meant’ to be. How my life was meant to be.

Slowly over time there was a burn (non-medical FYI) and a drive to do something more. To be something more. Whilst still working, I started looking at different ways to harness my passions and this creativity. I created an online business. It failed, dismally. But I kept persevering. I attempted to start an import company. This failed, shock horror. Almost every week, I was coming up with new ‘ah-ha’ idea and sharing them with my parents. The whole time I am sure, they were beginning to get concerned with my constant “more, more, more” attitude and drive. It must’ve been exhausting for them because it sure was for me.

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It wasn’t until I went overseas in 2015 and had the opportunity for the first time in my life to truly be by myself with no external persuasions. I found myself on the other side of the world with no-one I knew. I was doing whatever I wanted and doing it whenever I wanted to do it. It was the scariest realisation and also the most profound of my life. It was whilst I was overseas I quit my job. I enrolled in University. I had decided my life as I was living it, currently, was not enough. To a lot of people, I am sure, I looked bat sh*t crazy. (I probably still do TBH). I was leaving a well paying, stable job, to do, well I didn’t have a plan. I didn’t know what I was doing. I quit my job without a new job to go to AKA I had no money and I was broke. But I knew I wasn’t happy. So I went about fixing it. I was heading for a breakdown and just knew I couldn’t do it anymore. I was no longer the naive young girl with the five million dreams; I had grown up. I was a woman, yes, but I had no f*cking idea what I was doing!

So of course, once I quit my job and questioned everything. I fell into such a depressive lull. People where asking me what I was doing, where I was going, how I was doing, what the big plan was. But I was numb. I had no answers to any of it. I felt stupid and worthless. I had f*cked up. Royally. I also knew I was about to in debt up to my eyeballs. I had also convinced myself I wouldn’t finish my degree.

What. The. F*ck.

Screen Shot 2018-05-20 at 16.16.43This pivotal moment is what led me to where I am now. Right now, today, I am surrounded, daily, but the most influential and positive role models I have ever met. My best friends, my muses, my shoulders to cry on, my fellow wine whingers, my gym buddies, my siblings, my parents, my friends who I have made as the moniker ‘Everything by Erin’, these people are my family. These people are my support network. These people are why I keep doing what I am doing. These people are why I have not quit and did not quit and will not quit.

Getting back to my original point, life is what you make it. Over the past two years I have grown as a person expo-f*cking-nentially. I get to meet like-minded individuals on a daily basis, I have developed my blog, my business and have nearly graduated university. I have done this. The woman who literally questioned EVERY aspect of her life. And still does. But I can do this. How do I know that? Because I’ve done it. And if I can do this, anyone can.

I’m not the person I once was. I don’t regret who I was, the things I have done in my past or the path that I chose. I am just different. I have grown. I have become my own person. I don’t follow crowds and I sure as sh*t don’t care about what people think of me anymore. I have my family, my mentors and my friends that have become my family.

Screen Shot 2018-05-20 at 16.15.10To the people who understand my drive, my grind, my passion and what I strive to do; thank you for sticking by me and loving me and supporting me. To the people who I have lost along the way because we’ve drifted or we are no longer connect; I’m sorry. But everything that I do in my life is for me. No-one else. For everyone who has supported me; thank you.

Watch. This. Space.

E x

Side note – All quotes in todays blog are provided by the EVER-SO smart and talented boss b*tch Colette Werden (insta is @colettewerden)

 

 

New Years’ Resolutions cheat-sheet: instant happiness*

*happiness may or may not be instantaneous

Well, it is official, the first month of the new year is almost drawing to a close. It is easy to look back on 2017 and make one simple decision; do we repeat past ways (some may say mistakes), or do we pave new paths for ourselves? Ultimately these ‘resolutions’ we form, whether physical, financial or even sometimes emotional are what we use to guide us on the next 365 or so days of our journey.

With all the reflection that is occurring it is so easy to get lost on what really needs changing. For me, the whole purpose of a New Year’s resolution is to promote a positive change in my life. So in order to this, we have to identify aspects of our lives or environment that we want to be changed. It can be something as simple as learning to say thank you when you get your morning coffee or to make eye contact when you order your dinner. Resolutions and plans however trivial they may be, are just that; plans. You have to actively plan what you are doing and create ways and strategies to get what you want. Yeah of course sometimes plans don’t always pan out and that is also okay. (Hell if they did I would be a married mum of two by now and thank the LAWD that isn’t the case. Sidenote – all my plants are currently plastic, thank you IKEA. Another New Years Ressie not kept.)

Rather than tell you how to live your life and what to do, I thought I would merely suggest things that collectively we could all work towards to ensure that we all survive and make 2018 as positive and sane as we can.

So here is my freshly cultivated, no B-S list of things that need to remain FIRMLY in 2017.

  1. Being chicken sh*t. Now I know that this is A LOT easier said than done. But hey, if I can do it then so can you. Whether it be related to personal or professional  – carpe diem the crap out of life. You are never too young or too old to do anything. You wanna quit your job that you hate but keep because you don’t know how to resign? You are secretly in love with your best friends brother and have been since high school? You want to go back to university but you are in your mid-twenties and feel like you are too old? Now I am not trying to rip off everyone’s favourite shoe brand but for the love of Pete; just do it! Only you have the power to fix something so f*cking DO IT.
  2. Doing things for other people, not yourself. I am a big people pleaser. BIG. I love people coming to me and telling me their problems and wanting my advice. That stuff is what I live for. Well, I used to. You see the thing about constantly being other peoples soundboard is that when it came time to do things for myself or for me to talk about my feelings I felt like there was no-one there to listen. Obviously, this isn’t the case but I have learnt over time to not be so giving of myself to others who genuinely DNGAF about me.
  3. Sh*t relationships; sex, friends, family, work, just no. This is something I obviously don’t have to divulge too much on (hopefully?). It is quite easy just don’t fake it. Your sex, your friendships, your happiness, your work happiness. Don’t like it? Change it. Don’t live mediocrely. Life is way too short to be unhappy and stuck in sh*t circumstationships you don’t like. Yes, I made that word up. Deal with it.
  4. Bullying or just being a generally sh*t person. This is tied in with relationships. I don’t care if you are forty-six, twenty-six or sixteen (actually not sixteen, you are a child – stop reading); do not be a sh*t person. In a world that is so driven by (the false concept) of superiority and (also false) status quo, you don’t need to conform and in turn treat people like a POS just for self-vilification.  In the wise words of my Oma, “if you can’t say anything nice then don’t say anything at all.” Preach it Oms. If you do, you are not welcome in 2018. Back you go. Bye Felicia.
  5. Socks and sandals. Nuff’ said really. This is a legit no-brainer. I don’t care what Milan fashion week might be telling you in February. No! But in saying this, I am digging that everyone is more now than ever on board with the Birks. Go team!!

So here is to 2018. The new year, well what is left of it. A year for self-discovery and self-belief and most of all – a year where you do whatever you want to do because YOU want to. Not because you think you should do it, or because it will make you look good to other people. Do things for YOU not how you want to be perceived by the public, your partner, your (stalked) crush, your family or your nosey neighbour Sally who definitely keeps up with your life more than the Kardashians.

Do you (take this is whatever way you want), be you, be happy.

In the wise words of Rihanna – “Don’t let the bastards get you down. Turn it around…”

http://gph.is/1syVHON

Erin x

 

 

 

 

 

 

Resolutions Schmezolutions

So we’ve passed that weird week of Decanuary – where we have no idea of how long it is acceptable to eat the leftover ham and also we are busy deliberating on how exactly we are going to ‘slay’ the next 365 days. Now that we’ve entered the New Year; cue the hangovers, the #newyear #newme hashtags and all the other carrying on that occurs at this time of the year – engagements, break ups (sometimes fueled by others engagements) and the hook ups (sometimes fueled by break ups). New Year shenanigans are a tiring time. Another vital part of ringing in the new year is the resolutions. Now this isn’t something that you can just ignore. You either actively construct a list of ‘to-dos’ or you don’t. There is no in-between. Now me being the anal retentive list keeper that I am, I have devised a list of things I wanted to do this year. Will they be achieved? Probably not. Do they differ much from last years’ list that I definitely didn’t achieve in entirety? Again, probably not. Will my life crumble around me if I don’t achieve them? Same answer as before, probably not.

My 2017 New Year Resolutions

  1. Stop snapping at people, things, inanimate objects (includes at family who sometimes get a mouthful just for looking at me wrong, same goes to Matt – soz bud, the dog who cops a spray when she is just trying to warn me that a gecko poses a serious threat to our home, people who can’t drive, people who think they can drive, slow walkers, fast walkers, birds – cannot explain this one, they just irk me).
  2. Be as debt-free as possible (without impacting on my social life or leisure times – this refers solely to cartons of ciders, Netflix subscriptions and the weekly fake tan cult-like rituals)
  3. Approach every opportunity with an open mind (don’t instantly think ‘fck dat’, do the no deal girl emoji or shake my head profusely)
  4. Stop over-using emojis even though IOS has just made it 500 x easier #firstworldproblems
  5. Get my manual licence – self-explanatory really
  6. Get my regrowth sorted out at a frequency that doesn’t allow for me to be confused for a human skunk
  7. Stop getting so bloody sunburnt. You’d think I would know by now?
  8. Learn a language. Not going to happen but pays to be optimistic?

Now let’s be realistic this isn’t all of my resolutions. And it sure as sh*t doesn’t include my first and apparently most important ‘goal’ of 2017. The first thing I wrote down without even thinking, without even hesitating? Lose weight.

Now I’m not saying I actively want to lose weight, need to lose weight or even could possibly lose weight if I tried – it is just something that has always and always is on my resolutions list. Now I know for a fact that sometimes I am going to fluctuate in weight and I make out like it’s a problem but it isn’t. It’s all G. For example, a couple of years ago I spent three months-ish abroad stuffing my face with food and beers until I practically had to roll myself back to ‘home’ every day. I finished 2015 almost ten kilograms heavier then what I started it with. Did that make me reflect poorly on the year? Hell to the n-o girlfriend.

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Look at my little chipmunk face!!!!!!

But imagine if this was the only thing that my happiness or the only determining factor of whether or not my year was successful? No-one is going to say, “Geez 2015 sucked because I didn’t lose weight. All 365 days were wasted”. No one. Well not out aloud at least. So I’m culling it. Done. Gone. Na-da. The ‘W word’ is gone. Consider it as blasphemous as the ‘F word’ and I’m not talking fat.

Moving forward into next year this year, I am going to stop focusing on things that don’t matter. Will an extra cider hurt me when i’m two coats deep into my Thursday night basting of Bondi Sands? No! I will just have to boogy a little bit harder to Justin Bieber whilst doing so and that is more than okay with me. Don’t deny it, we all love the Biebs. Am I going to regret not getting the gluten free pasta option when I go out for dinner and drinks with the girls and look like a bloated baby humpback the next day? Probably. But IDGAF and neither should any of you.

Going to take a leaf out of my grandparents books for a little bit here, but stay with me Gen Y’s – it’s only brief! There is SO much more to life then to-do lists, to-complete lists or task lists. Sure it is fulfilling to be able to fist pump to yourself (quietly or loudly depending on what you are into); but it isn’t everything.

Rather than making it a NEW YEAR resolution why don’t we just make it a life resolution. Be happy. Do things in moderation and most importantly don’t let your happiness be determined by a tick or a cross on a to-do list. Get out there and get life done. To quote my boy Slim, ‘one shot or one opportunity to seize everything you ever wanted in life’.

As humans let us all make ONE  resolution together. It should be to help eradicate bullying, tormenting and all the other bulls*t that occurs both online and offline from trolls and in everyday life – schools, workplaces, etc. Bullying people is so last year. You are uncool.

Happy New Year x